A Ray of Sunshine
by Arxaith
Summary: “Zexion, why would you do this to yourself?” Zexion buried his face in the front of Demyx’s cloak, taking in his scent. “I-I can f-feel pain. I-It’s the o-only thing I-I can f-feel,” he said between tears. O.o you must read more! the pairing is zemyx!
1. Chapter 1

Hi!!! Emily here again with another Kingdom Hearts fanfic! (feel free to scream) lol

Anywho, the pairing in this is zemyx!

It's rated m for cutting and a bit of language...other than that, it's not so bad.

It was late in the afternoon. The sun was setting over Hollow Bastion. A lot of the stores were closing, the owners pulling down flaps to hide the windows. Everything seemed fine.

But to six men sitting in a lab just outside of town, everything was _far_ from fine. The air was thick with tension. A man with dark skin and white hair was pacing in front of the machine he and his assistants, now close friends, had designed. "We have to step through, tonight."

"I'm still a little skeptical," a man leaning against the wall said. His long dark brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail.

"I agree with Braig," a man sitting on the edge of a table said while twisting a lock of his dirty blonde hair, "I mean, Master Ansem was correct on a lot of his points. Hearts _are_ unpredictable."

The man with white hair slammed his fists on the table. "Even, are you saying you're going against me? I was under the assumption that you agreed with the research."

"Of-of course I do! I just don't think it's wise for us to jump into the Door to Darkness...Xehanort? Sorry, Ansem?"

Ansem sat, running a hand through his white hair. "Beyond this door could be the heart of all worlds. All of us stepping into the darkness will only prove that hearts are stronger than we lead them to be. That darkness in hearts is more powerful than pure darkness itself."

"Ansem..." a man with long black hair said.

"Yes Dilan?"

"What if it's too much? I mean, what if we-"

"It's a risk we'll all have to take," a man with short red hair said, "Gaining access to the heart of all worlds is too great a thing to pass up. We weren't afraid to research further. We weren't afraid to do the experiments. We weren't afraid to build this machine. Why are we getting cold feet now?"

"Aeleus is right," Braig said.

"There's only one thing I want to know," Even said slowly standing, "Who steps in first?"

Everyone was silent.

"Well, I vote for Ienzo," Braig said suddenly, "Little man was our test subject for all the other experiments."

The youngest of them all snapped his head up upon hearing his name. His violet bangs hung in his eyes. "Not this time! I had enough last time when Dilan burned my arm." He held up his hand, showing blistered skin.

"You wouldn't have gotten burned if you would've listened to me," Dilan snapped.

Ienzo glared at him.

"All right!" Ansem said loudly. He stood slowly, taking his lab coat off. He walked over to the machine and flipped a switch. A dark purple light filled the room as the portal slid open. Wind blew around. Ansem stood before the portal, his dark eyes staring at the light. "I'll see you all on the other side...in the darkness." He outstretched his right hand, touching the purple light. It flashed, causing the other men to cover their eyes. When they opened them, Ansem was gone.

"Ansem?!" Dilan shouted into the portal.

"He must have made it," Even whispered.

"I'll go next," Braig said stepping up on the platform. He looked at the others, grinned, and disappeared.

Dilan and Even went next.

Aeleus stepped up on the platform.

"This is madness," Ienzo said suddenly, "We don't even know if they survived, or where they ended up! Why did we agree to this?"

"Curiosity, Ienzo," Aeleus said before jumping in the light.

Ienzo looked around the empty lab. He sighed and stood up, pulling his lab coat off. He took his glasses off and set them on the table. He stepped up on the platform, the wind blowing his violet hair back. He peered into the light, trying to see his friends. He cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted, "Braig?! Even?! Xehanort?!" He had never called him Ansem. "Someone answer me!!" He lowered his hands when he got no response.

Ienzo took a deep breath and said, "I must be out of my mind." He stepped into the light.


	2. Chapter 2

Ienzo was falling...falling through darkness. Pain seared through his ribs, intense pain. He tried to scream, but found he couldn't use his voice. He struggled with the darkness that enveloped his body, smothering him. He was no longer falling. "Ienzo? Ienzo!" His eyes fluttered open. His vision was blurry but he could see people looking at him. "Little man!"

Ienzo groaned. "Braig? Is that you?" He sat up and looked around. Somehow, he had ended up in gray room with table and chairs in the center, glass flowers decorating the sides, and black curtains over the window. All of his friends looked different. Xehanort's hair was now silver, pieces of bangs hanging in his eyes, which were now orange. Braig had white streaks in his hair. He still had his eyepatch covering his missing eye, but was now sporting a large gash on the side of his face. _How'd that happen_, Ienzo wondered.

Dilan's hair was twisted up and he now had facial hair. Even's hair was lighter and his eyes were green. Aeleus's hair was more of a brick red now than a red brown. Ienzo winced and pressed a hand to his side. "Ow. What happened?" he asked tossing his hair out of his eyes. Wait a second...he had never had to do that before. And since when was his hair slate color?!

"Ienzo, calm down," Even said seeing the look of panic across the younger man's face. "We don't know what happened. But Xemnas has an idea-"

"Xemnas? Who's Xemnas?"

Xehanort bent down and said, "That's my new name. We've all lost our hearts. The darkness was too much to handle...we're no longer ourselves. That's why we all look different, and why you're in pain. You just got here."

Ienzo winced again.

"We all have new abilities too, for some strange reason," Dilan said raising a hand. Wind blew around the room.

"Anyway," Xemnas said, "All of us now have new names. Our old names belong with our other selves. Ienzo, meet Xigbar, Xaldin, Vexen, and Lexaeus."

Ienzo looked at his friends. The names sounded familiar for some reason. _All of them have an x_, he thought. "Name anagrams?"

"Yes," Xemnas said, "Now you get your new name." He held out his hand and Ienzo's name appeared in glowing letters in front of his face. They circled around his body, speeding in a blur of color. Xemnas held up his hand, stopping the letters, adding a new one...x. The name Zexion was in front of Ienzo's face.

"Zexion," he whispered.

I forgot to say before, please review! I luv 2 hear from peoples! thankies!


	3. Chapter 3

That had been three years ago. The Organization had gotten more members since then. Zexion leaned back in his chair. He was sitting in the castle library, the only place he could find peace, with a large book open in his hands. Saix had come a week later. Xemnas had found him wandering in the darkness and had taken a shine to him almost immediately. Axel was next. For whatever reason (he'd never tell anyone why), Zexion tended to avoid him. Demyx was Number IX. He highly intrigued Zexion...and highly annoyed him. Luxord had been found about a year later. Then Marluxia and Larxene and Roxas was the final member.

Zexion flipped a page, his eyes skimming over the book. A loud crash caused him to look up. Demyx was lying on the ground in the doorway. "Sorry, my cloak got caught on the doorknob." The blonde stood up and bounded over to Zexion.

He sighed. "What are you doing in here Number IX?"

"I dunno. I got bored I guess. Everyone else is busy and no one will talk to me. What are you doing?"

"Trying to read," Zexion said in an irritable voice. He sank lower in the arm chair and held the book in front of his face. Demyx grinned and grabbed the spine of the book, forcing it down into Zexion's lap. "Do you know how annoying you are?"

"Yeah," the blonde said still grinning, "But that's why ya love me!"

Zexion felt heat rise in his cheeks. Thankfully his blue-grey hair hid half of his face. Usually, he was the master of hiding his emotions, but around Demyx... "We can't love IX. We can't feel anything."

"That's such a bummer and I know it's not true. Axel and Roxas-"

"Don't remind me."

"Besides, I'm happy all the time! I _feel_ happy."

Zexion rolled his light blue eyes. A part of him wanted to agree with Demyx, but his logic was screaming no. "We're Nobodies. Or did you forget?"

"Not being able to feel is depressing," Demyx whined, "No one can't not feel!"

Zexion slammed the book shut. Demyx blinked at the action. Zexion placed the book on a table and opened a portal, which he stepped through and into his room. He flopped down on his bed, burying his face in the cool pillow. "Xemnas keeps telling us we don't have emotions," he whispered, "Then why do I feel so weird around Demyx?" He sat up. "I _hate_ not having a heart," he said bitterly. Demyx. If it wasn't for Demyx, he wouldn't be so confused. Demyx was right about one thing...most of the other members acted like they had hearts. Axel and Roxas were a perfect example.

Zexion slowly pulled his black leather gloves off. He walked out on his balcony, closing the door behind him. He pushed up his left sleeve. His eyes fell upon the red lines that crisscrossed along the inside of his wrist. He closed his eyes thinking, _I need a razor_. A thin blade appeared in his right hand. Illusion did have it's advantages. He pressed the blade against the inside of his wrist, dragging it across his flesh, leaving a dark line of red. He bit his lip at the pain that dug into his arm. _Pain_, he thought, _I can feel pain. At least I can feel something._ He made another cut, his blood dripping down his arm, landing on the balcony. After the blade had kissed his flesh a few more times, he sank to the ground, feeling lightheaded.

He leaned against the concrete railing, closing his eyes. The blade vanished. He pressed his right hand against his arm, blood seeping through his fingers.

"Zexion!" His eyes snapped open at the voice. Demyx was standing in front of him, horror in his usually bright childish eyes. "What are you- Why would you- Oh my god!" He bent down, trying to pull Zexion to his feet. "Let me help you!"

"No, Demyx, I'll be fine. Just leave me alone," Zexion said as Demyx pulled him back inside the castle.

"You're bleeding...a lot!" He pulled the shorter man into the bathroom and turned the water on. He held Zexion's wrist under the cold running liquid. Zexion winced from the touch. He tried to pull away but Demyx's grip was too tight.

"Dammit Demyx! Let go!"

"No! Your arm has to quit bleeding." Demyx manipulated the water so it would form a bracelet around Zexion's wrist. His blood was dying the water pink.

"Dammit let go!" He jerked his arm out of Demyx's grasp and stormed back into his bedroom.

"Zexion..." Demyx started, running after him.

"Adepto ex meus cella!!" Zexion shouted, without even thinking, in Latin.

"H-Huh?"

"Iustus licentia mihi unus!"

Demyx grabbed Zexion and said, "I can't understand you! Calm down and speak English!"

Zexion sank to the ground, tears streaming down his face. He hadn't cried since he had been Ienzo. Demyx sat beside him, pulling him against his chest. "Zexion, why would you do this to yourself?"

Zexion buried his face in the front of Demyx's cloak, taking in his scent. "I-I can f-feel pain. I-It's the o-only thing I-I can f-feel," he said between tears.

Demyx gently rubbed his back. "It's okay Zexion. It's okay." He lifted Zexion's head up, making him look at him. He smoothed his blue-grey hair out of his face, revealing his other light blue eye. "You don't have to hurt yourself to feel. You can feel anything you want."

"Xemnas said we don't have emotions. But you- I feel so strange around you."

"Strange how?"

"Well...I don't know."

Demyx wiped away a tear with his thumb. He smiled brightly at Zexion, pulling him close. "I think I do."

Zexion's eyes widened as Demyx moved closer. Demyx tilted his head, a few blonde whispies fell across his face. He closed the space between their lips, kissing Zexion gently. Zexion wrapped his right arm around Demyx's neck, deepening the kiss. The two pulled away. A faint blush was on Zexion's cheeks. "See!" Demyx said smiling.

"What?"

"You're blushing! I knew you weren't an emotionless rock!"

Zexion smiled. He kissed Demyx then said, "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."

Demyx grinned and said, "Then why didn't you?"

"I was confused. We aren't suppose to feel...But it doesn't matter now." He put a hand on Demyx's cheek.

Demyx looked at his wrist and said, "You're still bleeding! I'll be right back." He jumped up and ran into the bathroom. Zexion stood up slowly and sat on the bed. Demyx ran back in the room. He sat next to Zexion and put a band-aid on the cuts he had just made a few minutes ago. He kissed the bandages and said, "There. All better!"

Zexion smiled, holding the blonde close to him. "You're so cute," he whispered against his ear, "Thank you."

"For what?"

"I think you know." Zexion kissed Demyx, intertwining his fingers in his blonde spikes. Demyx grinned kissing back. The two sat on the bed for the longest time, planting soft, passionate kisses on each others lips. They fell against the sheets, holding each other close. Zexion lay on Demyx's shoulder, his nose against the blonde's cloak. "Hey Zexy?"

"Yeah?" he asked mentally noting the nickname.

"What's my scent like?"

"Huh? Oh. You really want to know?" Demyx nodded. Zexion kissed him again. "You smell like strawberries and salty sea air."

Demyx grinned. "You know, as bad as I hate to, we should head downstairs. It's almost dinner time."

"Yeah, you're right." Zexion sat up and got off of the bed. Demyx suddenly grabbed his waist and pulled him back on the bed. "What are you-"

"I don't think Xemnas would mind if we skip dinner tonight," he said, a mischievous grin on his face. He pushed Zexion against the sheets and straddled him. "Cause you aren't going no where!" He bent down and kissed Zexion, pinning his hands above his head, being careful about his wrists.

"Yeah well," Zexion said, "If we get in trouble, _you're_ explaining why we weren't there."

welp, that's all folks!!! lol :-P ummm, i hope people will review my story, I'd luv 2 hear wut u thought of it

A/N lol strawberries, i must be losing it :-P


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